Dave the Dealer

Dave the Dealer CD single


Dave is a man who likes a toke, he said the price of weed is a joke, and cos of the amount he likes to smoke, means by Wednesday he’ll be broke, and he won’t get paid till Friday, which means he’ gonna have a couple of dry days.

So one day Dave got some Ganja seeds, and some special lights to grow his weed, he got himself a book so he could read all of the information he would need, then he planted up hundreds of pots, he wanted to grow lots and lots.

A few months later the crop was looking good, kilos upon kilos of the finest looking bud, there was enough to supply the neighbourhood, so he set himself up dealing cos the money is good. Word spread quickly that Dave was selling his fine weed oh so sweet smelling.

So now he’s Dave the Dealer man, a horticultural expert with a business plan, just a couple of months after it all began, theres always money in his pocket and a spliff in his hand. But he got a little too complacent, he didn’t see the camera in the house adjacent.

Dave the Dealer, Dave the Dealer, Dave the Dealer man. Selling his weed to all the tokers in town, until somebody fucked up his plan. Dave the Dealer, Dave the Dealer, Dave the Dealer trusted his customers to keep it quiet, but he ended up getting busted.

One Sunday morning about quarter past four, Dave got woke up by coppers kicking down his door. They dragged him out of bed and pinned him to the floor, cuffed him, said,”you’re nicked, you won’t be selling weed no more” and now they’re gonna lock him up with all the criminals and sinners, where the beds ain’ very nice, and neither are the dinners.

They tore his house apart looking for the stash, they found 37 kilos and a suitcase full of cash. They found his cocaine and contraband fags hidden underneath the bed with his porno mags. Poor old Dave, he never did anybody any harm, he kept us all happy with his little indoor Ganja farm.

Dave the Dealer……………..

Such a shame he got locked up, his deals were never underweight, we called him Dave the Dealer then, but now we call him Dave the inmate.

It was a good job Dave had a backup plan, he left some spare equipment round his best Mate, Dan’s. It didn’t take long after he went to jail that Danny got the weed back out on sale. Yeah, Dave’s locked up, but the week’s still growing, cos Danny boy’s keeping them bright lights glowing.

Dave the Dealer………….

He got twelve months, but he behaved, so they let him out after eight. And now he’sDave the Dealer again, instead of Dave the inmate.

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